Sarah Perry to Charity Rotch, Newport, 11th mo 10th 1811

              B-284-1 
	
My Dear Cousin  when I received thy kind letter two year & half ago I intend
ed answering it immediately but I was overwhelmd with cares & Sorrows at
that time & a succession of  care[illegible]& poor health has attended ever
my poor Brother had been in a very distressed situation for many Months & con
tinued so until his very painfull close. Which I trust was in peace-for the
poor thing had been making reasonable allowances for his Natural infirmitys uni-
formly obligeing innocent & kind to all for several years & had Left off all
unbecoming Language.  Fully believing that the all mercifull Creator does
not require so much where he has been pleased to bestow but Little- but this Calm
										        able	
desireable frame of mind was succeeded by the loss of reason & he was so ungovern
that my Lodgers would not stay in the louse if he did for Like all other poor
things destitute of reason must do almost every thing he ought not to do would go
		    house
in every morn in the^ Night or day & those in there would not be so disturb in that
manner- & as it was impossible to Confine him at home I was obliged to Consent to
the very painful & only alternative of permitting him to be placed in the house
appointed for such poor unhappy beings, painfull & distressing as the alternative
was I was obliged to submit to it- for I saw no way to get Bread for him & the
rest of my family if I kept him with me when he had been hardly two month my
lodgers went away- & I had him home again immediately to try what I could do
with him- & while we were alone we made out with spending almost all our
time watching & indulging him- but as soon as we had Company it seemed as if his
disorder increased & there was no governing him at all- & I was obliged a second time
to submit to his going from me he was there about four months when he had a
fitt  I sent for him home as soon as I knew it he appeared perfectly
								 much
rational tho it was difficult to understand all he said- was very^ pleased that he was
at home & I was as much So that he was with us- & as it appeared like a Stroke
of Palsy  I thought he might continue years & I felt as if it would be a Comfort to
wait on him in that helpless State if he was rational for he looking innocent as
a Lamb but the Next day his distress returned  fits & Spasms Succeeded each other
                 nights
he lived three  & three days in the most inexpressible distress I ever say anyone in by
far the Sound of his groans & shrieks still seem fresh in my hearing for we could
hear him in every part of the house  he finished this painfull pilgrimage  the
the 13th of the first Month 1809 & is I believe at rest but I think I have not met with
any thing that has caused me so much real anguish of heart as his Sufferings
			       Care	
after he was Left Solely in my^ I endeavourd to consider him as one of my Children
& make every allowance for his weakness that I should for a Child- & Comforted
myself when he was troublesome with the hope that by bearing patiently with him in
every respect & making him Comfortable as any of us was I was entirely discharging
my duty but since he has been remov d I have distressed myself with the thought that
there were many Little things I have said or done that would perhaps have Consoled
him  I am a poor frail Creature Clothed with imperfections & weakness